Restoring Dermot Read online

  Some part of me hoped for a true relationship with my husband. I longed so deeply for someone to truly love me. But Rian had said it well in the council meeting. We had both been forced into this marriage, and he would probably resent me for it for the rest of our lives together.

  Lost in thought, I started walking without a plan as to where I was headed until I realized I had turned down the hallway that led back to my new chambers. Rian was leaning against the wall beside our chamber door. His presence there stopped me in my tracks.

  With his arms folded across his broad chest, his upper arms bulged against the fabric of his shirt. The thought of the way those arms had held me briefly flashed through my mind, causing a fluttering in my stomach. I looked down at the floor and slowly continued toward him.

  As soon as I was close enough, he grabbed my waist and pulled me to him, wrapping those arms around me. “Are you all right?”

  “Yes.”

  He tilted my head back and kissed me on the lips, causing my heart to race. It was all I could do not to react in a way that would embarrass us both. “I thought we would go into town for dinner. What do you think?”

  I only nodded. I expected him to question me about what my father had wanted. It was sure to come up sooner or later. Should I tell him the truth? If I did, would he be honest with me and reveal to me what Father wanted to know?

  We retrieved our cloaks and then headed into town. April was winding down and just in the last few days most of the snow had melted, leaving the ground soft. We stuck to the packed roadway but still the hem of my skirt was covered in mud by the time we reached our destination.

  In truth, I had never dined in town before. I was excited for this new experience, but there was trepidation as well. We entered a small tavern and were immediately shown to a small table in the back corner of the dank room. Everyone turned to stare while some of their whispered murmurs made their way to my ears. They knew exactly who we were. Rian did not seem to notice the attention we had gathered.

  The server did not greet us as he set a plate filled with thick slabs of roasted pork and a medley of stewed vegetables in front of each of us along with a mug of ale. A basket of coarse bread was set between us. I glanced around the room at the other diners. Several were openly glaring back at me. This was why I hardly ever came to town.

  Rian placed his hand on mine and leaned toward me. “Pay them no mind. It is my presence that is making them uncomfortable. I am foreign to them, and they do not trust me. Surely, they will come around in time. Just forget about them and tell me what is on your mind. What are your thoughts on this morning’s meeting?”

  I tried to concentrate as I peered into his pale brown eyes. What had the meeting been about again? Oh yes, my father wanted to take over the entire country and somehow thought Rian had a plan that would bring it about.

  “How does he expect you to overcome your brothers?” I twisted my lips to the side and looked down at the table. I had not meant to say that out loud. Rian had asked for my thoughts, and it just popped out of my mouth.

  He reached for my hand, drawing it up to his lips and kissed the back of my fingers. “You have lost me, Princess. What do you mean by that?”

  “Father seems to think you have a plan to take control of Kearnley, and I just realized that in order to do that, you would have to overpower your brothers. What would make him think you would even be willing to go against them? I know you have been out of contact and maybe they were the cause of you leaving. I am sure Father knows more about the situation than I do.”

  I needed to stop talking. Rian’s relationship with his family was none of my business. Suddenly, I remembered that I was supposed to be gathering information about this very thing. Maybe my random speech would at least cause Rian to open up.

  He rubbed his thumbs across the back of my hands and then released them so he could return to his food. “My brothers had nothing to do with me leaving. How much do you know about what happened with my parents?”

  “I only know what was said in the meeting, which was confusing.” And rather alarming.

  “Before my father’s death, I thought the world of him. Afterward, I found out he was responsible for having my eldest brother murdered. He had attempted to have Reagan eliminated as well, and Garrett had been tortured at his command.”

  Ice coursed through my veins. It was hard to believe a father would go to such lengths. “Why would he do that?”

  “At the time, it was to gain control of Aisling. Brianna had married Garrett instead of my oldest brother, Dunbar. By eliminating the two eldest, Garrett would be heir to both thrones which would join the two kingdoms after my father’s death. I do not understand everything that went on, but he tried to torture Garrett into giving up control of Aisling before that time.”

  Dunbar must have been the older brother he mentioned in the council meeting. I had never heard of him before now. Still, I was more curious about how his mother fit into this story. Rian said she was weak and had not kept to her duties as mother and queen. What did he mean? If I did not want the same fate, I needed to know what she had done to cause his disdain.

  “What did your mother have to do with all of this?” My stomach tensed as I awaited his response.

  Rian pressed his lips into a hard line and breathed deeply through his nose. “I believe she knew, or at least suspected what our father was up to. She did nothing to stop him until it was too late.” Bitterness coated his words. The sadness reflected in his eyes made me want to reach out to him. “I was there the day Brianna came accusing Father of his crimes. I could not believe what she said was true until Mother took a knife and ended Father’s life.”

  His mother had killed her own husband? This is what my mother considered true love? “You saw this? How old were you?”

  “I was nine years old. I will never forget that day. My life turned up-side-down, and nothing has been right since.”

  “Oh Rian, I am so sorry.” I reached for his balled fist. I rubbed his hand and it relaxed a little beneath mine, though I was sure it was a forced reaction. Bitterness was written on his features.

  “What happened next? What happened to your mother?” I probably should have let the subject drop, but I had to know. I was too invested in his story.

  “She took to her bed. She stopped eating, and she stopped caring. Less than a year later, she followed Father into the grave.” He sounded so cold and heartless, but his face told a different tale. I wanted to reach out and ease the pain I saw there.

  He slipped his hand from beneath mine and started back on his meal. I took a couple of bites, but the food had cooled and was tasteless in my mouth. Eventually, we both gave up on the pretense of eating and placed our napkins on our plates.

  Rian waved the server over to our table. “I am ready to pay my bill.”

  The server looked at me and then back to Rian.

  I cleared my throat to get my husband’s attention. “Whenever we need something from town, the bill is usually sent to the castle.”

  “Oh yes, that is right. I had forgotten.”

  He seemed a little out of sorts as we left the tavern. It was no wonder considering the conversation we had there. What could I say to get things back to the way they were?

  Rian glanced over his shoulder toward the way we had just come. “I have no concern at all over what the people here think of me, but I do not like the way you were treated. I should have said something. I am sorry.”

  “They did not do anything wrong. Not really.” I shrugged. “Besides, they were like this before you got here. I am sure it has more to do with the fact that Father refuses to pay full price for anything. He will only pay seventy percent of the cost of any goods or services consumed by the castle.”

  Rian looked at me with his brows drawn. “Surely the merchants here must raise their prices to compensate.”

  “By our laws, to do so would be treason and punishable by death.”

  He looked at the town around us.
What did he think of Father’s policies? It seemed almost a betrayal to reveal this information to him, but it was common knowledge. Besides, Rian had every right to know my father’s dealings now that he was expected to one day replace him.

  As we walked in silence for the rest of the way back to the castle, I kept going back to his revelations concerning his parents. I remembered the hunger in my own father’s eyes as he had talked of a possible plan that would have all of Kearnley under one rule. Would he be willing to go to the same lengths and have his child murdered or tortured to bring this plan about? A shiver went up my spine. Thinking of how I had been treated over the last week, it did not seem as farfetched as it once would have.

  Fifteen

  Rian

  In the ten years since I left home, I had never once felt compelled to mention my parents. It had happened so long ago, but speaking to Adrika about them brought back all the painfulness those events had caused.

  It was much later before I realized she had not asked the one question I knew her father wanted her to. Whether I knew what my father’s plans consisted of. I had no idea what his plans were. Knowing what he had done to try and gain Aisling, I could only imagine.

  I was the youngest of five boys. Dunbar was gone. Reagan was next, and at the time of Father’s death, he was thought to be dead as well. Even through torture, Garrett had never given up control. He would probably be dead if Father had not gone first. Then there was Terence, the most beloved of the family. He was eight years my senior but his mind did not match his age. Would Father have sacrificed him to place me as ruler?

  Neither my father nor his tactics were mentioned again that week. Adrika seemed more open to me in the days that followed, and I found a physical comfort in being with my wife like I had never known before.

  The king held court every day with Adrika sitting in her usual spot while I stood on the other side of her. From what I could tell, she was little more than a fixture there. She seemed content, or at least resolved, in this position. Much to the annoyance of King Farris, I sometimes interrupted the proceedings to ask questions of his subjects.

  I began to notice that much more money came in than was being paid out. The castle, as well as what part I had seen of the kingdom, was falling to disrepair, and the king seemed to take no notice of it. Where was the money going?

  My mind came back to the task at hand. A servant stood before the king complaining of a leak in the roof over the servants’ quarters. Farris then suggested he see the cook for a spare pot. I gritted my teeth at the stupidity of it all. I was on the very edge of questioning the king right there in front of all present, when a commotion coming from outside the throne room door spared him my inquisition.

  A richly dressed man of apparent nobility pushed his way through the line of people waiting to state their cases. It would be interesting to see how Farris would respond to the request of a person of higher rank. Instead of veering toward the king, the man headed straight for me. My brain suddenly caught up to the fact that the one approaching was none other than my brother, Reagan.

  My feet carried me from the dais by their own accord. I had wondered what Reagan’s reaction would be when we met again. Would he be as glad to see me as I would him, or was he still angry over my wrongful actions of so long ago? All my previous questions and fears flew away as he threw his arms around me and held on tightly.

  “It really is you. You have come home. Gwen will be so happy.” His words sounded strained and broken. Normally such a show of affection would embarrass me, but I had missed him too much to care.

  I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. I managed to keep myself in check. When I pulled back and looked into the face of the man who had been like a father to me, he seemed unabashed by the tears streaming down his own cheeks. He looked so much like Father, I was slammed with an instant longing for the man of my childhood but easily pushed it away. The brother before me was twice the man my father had been.

  The only thing unchanged about Reagan’s appearance was the color of his eyes. They were the same light brown as my own, but his now had creases on the outside corners. His black hair was longer, reaching just above his shoulders now. His sideburns were sprinkled with gray. Oddly enough, I had been picturing him as the twenty-seven-year-old he had been at the time of my departure. What must he think of me? I had changed much from the gangly fifteen-year-old he had seen last.

  He laughed as he touched my face. “You are taller than I am now.”

  King Farris loudly cleared his throat, capturing our attention. “As sweet as it is that the two of you have been reunited, would you mind taking this elsewhere? You have interrupted my court.”

  The look Reagan gave Farris was reminiscent of our father. He pointed at the king in a threatening manner. “You and I will talk later.” He then smiled at me as he grabbed my elbow and led me out the side door.

  We began walking slowly down the hallway. I looked over at him and smiled, still amazed that he was here. “I am surprised you got here so soon. I only sent the message out a week ago. I figured it would take a couple of weeks before I heard anything, if at all.”

  “What do you mean if at all?”

  I looked down at my feet. “Well, given the way I left, I would not blame you if you never spoke to me again.”

  He squeezed my shoulder. “You are my family, Rian, and I love you. Whatever happened all those years ago is forgotten. A lot has changed since you left, and to answer your question, travel is one of them—at least it has changed once you get outside of Dermot.”

  I had no idea what he meant, but it did not seem important. “I kept hoping you would hear about me and come sooner. I guess gossip is not what it used to be either.”

  Reagan turned to look at me. “I heard that you were here, but there have been so many reports of people spotting you over the years, that we have learned to ignore those rumors. Is it true you were held prisoner here and were forced into marrying the princess?”

  The way he said it made it sound so much worse than it was. Well, the prison part was pretty harsh, but my marriage to Adrika was a different matter. “It is true that I languished in one of Dermot’s outside prisons for over a month, but it is more accurate to say that I was persuaded into marrying the princess.”

  “He kept you in one of the outside prisons for over a month and in the wintertime to boot?” His voice rose with each word. It was uncanny to see my father’s glare on Reagan’s face.

  “In all fairness, he did not know who I was at the time.” I led him into the library and closed the door behind us. “We will have more privacy in here.”

  Stopping just inside the room, Reagan took a moment to look around as he turned in a circle. “I broke Gwen’s heart once, right here in this very room.”

  Adrika had her heart broken in the room as well, but it was not by me. I could still see the hurt look in her eyes when she realized what her father had planned. I moved through the room looking behind each drape covering the windows to make sure we were alone.

  We sat down across from each other in two of the wingback chairs, and I briefly touched on all that had happened since leaving Gilvary. Strangely, my description of the first ten years went by much more quickly than the last couple of months. I had been a soldier in Rivania. Other than the events of my last year there, nothing else was of consequence.

  Reagan listened patiently, asking very few questions, but when I got to the proceedings leading up to my wedding, he leaned towards me with his elbows on his knees and his fingers steepled in front of his mouth.

  “I am not so sure your marriage is legal. I mean, besides the fact that you were practically forced into it, just because this uncle of hers has authority to perform a ceremony in Cordelia, does not necessarily hold merit in Kearnley.”

  “Regardless of the law, Adrika and I are married in the eyes of God. We are committed to each other and to the vows we made. I believe it was God’s will for us to be together. If that had not been the
case, I would have figured a way out before it even happened.”

  He held both palms out toward me. “You are right. I was just making sure everything was covered before I spoke to King Farris. I can see that you have matured into a man who can handle himself. But I am a king and he is a king—both on the same level. He has reminded me of this regularly in the past when it was to his advantage. I know it will do nothing to change what has transpired since your arrival, but I think he needs a reminder. He still has me and Garrett to contend with, and you are our brother.”

  “Are you sure Garrett feels the same?”

  Reagan’s gaze jerked toward me. “Have you not heard from him? His letter to me caught up to me on the way here. He said he sent you an invitation to come a month early to Aisling for Session. My family is going then. It is one of the reasons Gwen did not come, as anxious as she is to see you again. I will be meeting her there when I leave here.”

  Twice a year in June and December, the three kingdoms came together to discuss things that affected the whole country. The kingdoms took turns hosting these events. It was also a time of celebration with a ball held at the start of each meeting. I remembered how our families had begun coming together during the weeks before everyone else arrived when Session was held in either Gilvary or Aisling. It was exciting to think I would be able to see everyone at once within a month’s time.

  Reagan regaled me with stories to catch me up on everything I had missed while away. When I had left the country, Reagan and Gwen had two children—a son fathered by Dunbar that they were raising as their own, and one daughter. They now had five children. Garrett and Brianna had only the one girl then, but they had an addition of two boys now.

  My brothers had been living good, wholesome lives and growing their families while I had nothing to show for my ten years away but a tattoo on my arm that would forever mark me as a deserter of my country. That was not entirely true. I also had a wife I did not know, and my inheritance as future ruler of a kingdom that was falling apart.